Once upon a time, I got married. The day after our wedding, we were preparing to leave for our honeymoon when we heard a horrific noise that sounded like a cat screeching out in pain. We followed the noise to find our smallest, most beloved kitty had somehow managed to catch her leg in between the back of our old Blazer and the rear metal bumper. She was fighting like crazy, screeching and writhing around, trying to get out of that painful spot. The more she fought, the worse the damage to her leg became. It took my husband having to put on thick leather work gloves (which she bit through in her scared agony) and moments of struggling against her and the bumper before she finally found the release she was seeking. By the time it was done, she had a broken leg with much muscle damage and our honeymoon was delayed.
This is the memory God stirred in my mind recently when I was arguing with Him that I didn’t want the “word” He’d given me for 2016: “Be still.” I struggle with the “stillness” in God, mostly because I still battle so deeply with my overwhelming desire for control. I know it is sinful and idolatrous to fight God for control, but my trust issues make the struggle real for me.
This year, God is calling me to a season of stillness in Him. A year of learning to rest in His presence and allow Him to get me out of this painful spot. I know the more I fight to control my situation, the worse it makes things, just like my poor kitty’s leg. I have to understand what my kitty could not, the big hands are there to help me and hold me, not cause me more pain. Though I may be in pain, I must be still and allow God to do what is needed to get me through this. I have faith it will be through this stillness that I will be able to fully understand what it means to rest in the peace of my God and that I will be able to reach a level of trusting Him that will help me to conquer that sinful desire for control.
Word: Be still.
Verse: Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10
“So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior.”